My premium account expired. Saaaad

I'm trying not to talk myself out of writing difficult things, but right now I'm at the point that I'm denying what happened to me because I don't want to write about it. Maybe it is just not yet time. I've kept it buried for so long... I never told my parents or any of my friends, or at least I never told them the whole story. There was always that one part that I kept secret, and I've always been disappointed that no one cared as much as I wanted (one friend barely cared because apparently her issues were more important than mine). I've told my boyfriend and two other friends recently. So I'm getting there.